Unsolicited advice, 1: How to get into graduate school

Your humble bloggers here at Cosmic Variance have spent quite a bit of accumulated time in academic and research settings -- in fact, my guess is that none of us have spent an entire year away from such a setting since the age of about six or so. That's a lot of accumulated wisdom right there, and it's about time we started sharing it. Since it's that time of year when applications are being sent off to graduate schools, I thought I would start off by letting everyone in on the secret to how to get accepted everywhere you apply. Of course I can only speak for physics/astronomy departments, but the basic lessons should be widely applicable. So, here goes: have great grades, perfect GRE scores, significant research experience, and off-scale letters of recommendation. Any questions? If, perhaps, it's a bit too late to put that plan into action, here ...