Orbitz is the Workshop of Satan

In China Mieville's Perdido Street Station, there is a scene in which Mayor Rudgutter parleys with the ambassador of Hell. It's a negotiation he has performed before, but is nevertheless disconcerting; although the ambassador appears as a well-spoken and immaculately dressed man, his words are accompanied by a faint echo from deep in the Pit below, "in the appalling shriek of one undergoing torture." I'm pretty sure I heard the same thing on the phone with Orbitz last night. Our story begins several months ago, when I booked a round-trip ticket to attend a conference in Greece. (I normally wouldn't even bother relating this little adventure, except that extensive focus-grouping has revealed that readers love nothing more than chronicles of our travel-related follies.) It was in September, just after I had moved to LA, and various things came up that couldn't be neglected -- unfortunately, and uncharacteristically, I ended up ...