The Hole In The Ground

So, imagine. There's a giant hole in the ground a mile deep somewhere in Britain. It appeared in a major populated area. Maybe it is the size of a football field (either type). Let's say there's a population of hungry crocodiles at the bottom. Maybe a lion or two. Also hungry. People are falling into this hole, and dying as a result. There's a big public outcry. The British Government's reaction? They commission an inquiry. The panel of inquisitors will be headed by some reasonably distinguished person, usually male. If the hole is considered to be in an important enough area, i.e., the South of England, then the head of the committee will be a Lord or some sort, to show appropriate urgency. The panel will call several expert witnesses over about two years. Everybody will have forgotten about their outrage, and learned to live with the hole. People will still be falling down the hole, mind you, but it will become accepted. Then, after six further months of writing the report, Lord Somesort will publish the Somesort Report. The scab of the old wound will be torn off, and the media and the general public will go nuts all over again. The report will say "Take the animals out and put a cover over the hole". The government will not agree with the outcome of the report. Maybe they argue that the hole is not the root cause of people falling, it's gravity. Maybe they argue there's not enough money; It's not the turn of the Millennium, and so there's no reason to spend money on something you can't call the "Millennium Hole", and you can't divert money to it in the name of the Olympics. So the argument rages on. The Somesort Report is placed on a dusty shelf somewhere and forgotten about. This is a major part of how politics is done in Britain. We love our inquiries, and our reports, it seems. Why am I telling you this? People are arguing about a report, released yesterday. It was of the other sort, the one that comes from a think tank, so there's no Lord, and it was not commissioned by the Government. It is the Chatham House Report, and it says: (I quote the Guardian's paraphrase)